Screw you, Bakakastel

Screw. You.

Now you can totally tell how I am not amused at all.

So… turns out that I’m participating in yet another Blog Carnival. Not on my own accord, though. I was kinda forced into it. By whom, you ask? By Whateverkastel, as the title already indicates. It’s also totally unfair, considering how Bakakastel’s sole reason for doing this to me was that I offered my condolences to him. What a jerk, what a scumbag! This shall be forever remembered as the Blog Carnival’s stab-in-the-back legend. Yeah, sounds totally accurate to me.

Okay, I’m done with the soapbox now. So basically, this is part of the Anime Blogger Interrogation Game. It’s just like your average day on facebook, with attention whores doing stupid things while pretending they care so much about the social networking stuff and interacting with each other even though they don’t give a damn about anyone else’s entry. I guess we are totally connected to each other now. Remember, communication is important!

What it boils down to is that I have to answer 5 questions coming straight from him whose name shall not be spelled properly and to come up with five questions on my own. Said five questions are to be directed towards five bloggers as well as to be answered by myself. In case I just don’t wanna give an answer, I am forgiven if I post a cute picture™. However, since I don’t have any with me right now, no cute picture™s for you. That’s just too bad.

Note, however, that since that meanie Bumkastel has a screw loose or two, the questions are rather… well, questionable.
Onto the “fun” then!

1. Sawa’s too fat for her horse. And she needs like OMG TOTALLY diet~~~ How is Tari Tari better than Hanasaku Iroha?

Eeeeeeh… I’ve never seen anyone complain about Sawa’s weight except for Sawa herself. You know, most people don’t care about Sawa riding her horse, it’s usually the other way around: All they want to see is the horse riding Sawa and let’s be honest – that’s pretty much the only reason why TARI TARI exists.
Which brings us to the actual question: Is the show any better than Hanasaku Iroha? No. Mind you, Hanasaku Iroha is totally sub-par, but TARI TARI is even worse than that. Both shows basically suffer from painfully melodramatic writing and god awful characters. If half your episode consists of entirely useless yet sooo dramatic flashbacks with no impact on anything, you know it’s time to drop the towel. I’m not even into it for the guilty pleasure thingy since dumb shows tend to bore me to death. It’s much more fun writing about it which is pretty much the only reason I’m still willing to follow this show. Sure, Hanasaku Iroha was dumb as fuck due to Mari Okada’s writing, but at least that one was entertaining – for all the right and all the wrong reasons. Since every line HAD to have some a corny meaning with that show, there was a lot more energy to it and I’d prefer that to TARI TARI’s unambitious approach any time.

2. If we pray hard enough, will Muv-Luv Alternative: Total Eclipse not be considered part of the Muv-Luv canon?

Keep dreaming, silly Fanboykastel. That’s never going to happen.
I also think that currently airing Mabu Rabu anime is getting too much crap these days. Okay, the beach episodes were rather abysmal (would still bone Yui), since a show about humanity’s decline shouldn’t be about harem antics and I totally disliked what they did with Yui’s character (I liked her when she was stern, not tsuntsun) but other than that, the character interactions are a lot of fun. VG is also totally fabulous!

3. A young eight-year old girl, proclaiming to be a hardcore anime fan just like you, forced you to define ‘anime’ for her book report. She is a fan of Avatar: The Last Airbender. How do you explain how Avatar is not an anime to her without making her cry and call the police for sexual harassment?

I give her a present, of course! You know, like every suspicious adult does. Children love presents, after all. And what a present it is, at that! A dead Pedokastel! Boy, we sure like that, don’t we? Everyone likes dead Pedokastels for free! Just think about all the shit you could do with a dead Pedokastel… like… tearing his limbs out. Splitting his head. Stuffing his brain with sweets. There are so many fun things to do! Get your own dead Pedokastel today!

4. People have called Serial Experiments Lain, Mawaru-Penguindrum, and other similar shows “not anime”. Does this statement make any sense?

No, it doesn’t. Penguindrum has pseudo-incest and Lain has a “cute” girl wearing a bear suit. Of course they are both anime!
I’d also like to state that I fucking hate Penguindrum. Aroduc did a splendid job with summing up all of the show’s problems in the last paragraph of this entry. If you’re in for a deepshit show, buy TEXHNOLYZE. I did the same, it’s totally worth it.

5. Is anyone ready for school?

I’ve only recently graduated from school and you’re coming up with this question, Studentkastel? Hidoi!
So, uhm, no. I can say, however, that I sorta miss school. I really do. I’ve been attending school for 12 years now and it feels just very, very strange that out of the sudden, I no longer have to do so. I think I have yet to get used to that feeling, since 12 years are a loooooong time. I just can’t neglect all of that.

Okay, so much for Stupidquestionskastel’s questions. Let’s give you a small break for now and illustrate why Horizon is so fucking awesome:

Wait, what?

OH

WOW

Heh, that’s a given. Flat chests – Cow tits: 1:0.

I like where this is going…

BEST SHOW

Break time is over, kiddies. Here are my own, nonsensical questions for you. Be prepared!

1.) If you were given the chance to write the name of one blogger in your Death Note, which one would you choose?

Turorukastel, of course. That should have been obvious from the very get-go.

2.) What’s your stance regarding monster girls?

Monster girls! Yatta! Aren’t they just perfect? Don’t you just want to hug them for all eternity? A monster girl fetish is the best fetish ever. It’s also the most extravagant one, so in one way or another, you belong to an elite. You’re a connoisseur!
Now, let’s elaborate on this deep and meaningful topic. You see, the main appeal behind monster girls is probably that they are different from ordinary girls. They make you realize that ordinary girls are just boring. Very boring. What’s the deal with a girl whose lower body isn’t that of a snake or something anyway? How can you not have a fluffy tail? How can they even consider themselves as girls? There must be something wrong with them! Also, moster girls are known for having better personalities. For instance, I have yet to see a tsundere monster girl.
If there’s one thing to criticize about monster girls, then it’s probably that most of them are missing human legs. Human legs are attractive. You just can’t comprehend the beauty of some legs out there. Every tights or thighhighs fetishist can relate to this and pretty much every anime fan out there likes one of the two.
Nevertheless, this doesn’t stop me from going all HNNNNGGGGHHHHH over monster girls. Legs? What about a snake’s lower body half? That’s also attractive! Okay, I do dislike long tails but monster girls like Alice are lovable nevertheless. I even think that girls with tentacles are attractive. Mmmhh… tentacles.
Note however, that there are several kinds of monster girls I’m not all too thrilled for. Spider girls, for instance. The huge thing they are carrying around on their back is just awkward. I think centaur girls are also kind of a turn off for me. When I read Monster Musume no Iru Nichijou, I thought the centaur girl was kinda cute. Some time afterwards, however, I stumbled upon a centaur girl doujin and it made me painfully aware that fucking a horse’s body is just gross. Who would have thought?
Please also take into account that every now and then, you get to see some Bapho-tan worshipping on this blog. Also, Anubis is my waifu, hands off. So… I guess I’m into the fur monster girl type. Never hold a grudge against fluffy tails.
As for other monster girl types… well, I’m not so sure whether I would mate with a plant. Maybe if it was cute. I guess that’s a matter to elaborate on some other time.

3.) What’s the most ridiculous screenshot you ever uploaded to you blog?

I think this beats pretty much everything else:

I’ve seen some shit but this is on a whole another level.

Mind you, this also cracks me up every time:

Oh God What Were They Thinking

4.) You are given the chance to get to read the doujin of your dreams. What would it be like?

Length: 300 pages.
Pandering to: All my fetishes.
Not pandering to: All your fetishes which I don’t share.
Respective show: Upotte!!
Title: “Sex life with Sako”
Why the specific character?: Sako is already batshit insane in battle, masturbating when she should be shooting at people. If she’s like that in open public, just imagine what she would be like in bed! Pure maidens like her rock. The Finnish rape train is all mine, just so you know!

5.) Communication among bloggers is important! Statistics prove that English anime bloggers have problems when it comes to interacting with other anime bloggers! What kind of measures would you take if you were in charge of bringing all anime bloggers across the world together?

A Battle Royale should do the trick. Didn’t you always want to see a match-up between Aroduc and psgels? With explosions? When given instructions, Aroduc would always complain about the amount of exposition. psgels would love the entire thing, because… uh… damn, he loves everything! I can already see all the deepshit editorial writers getting wet. Killing other anime bloggers! How deep! All that social commentary! Let’s elaborate on the meaning of life while killing other people! E-Minor would gladly die in order to mark this as a “post-modern tragedy”. Baka-Raptor would come up with a lot of slogans such as “Kill yourself so I don’t have to.” and then give his best not to go extinct. Nova is a gun fanatic, so he would be in advantage and that’s why I’d give him an empty beer bottle as a weapon. Trollkastel would fake his own death to troll other people only to die while doing so. What fun! What joy!
Yeah, this sounds totally legit to me.

Well, so much for that. Now it’s time for my fellow bloggers to go through the same suffering I had to endure.
I choose:
E-Minor from Moe Sucks
Mira from HACHIMITSU
Marow from Anime Viking
Baka-Raptor from BAKA-RAPTOR
Shinmaru from The Cart Driver

Okay, the show is over, time to go home. I already got a consent from Marow regarding this Interrogation Game, so stay tuned.

Also, on an unrelated sidenote: I guess I should replace my anti-spyware program, it can’t even properly spell “countdown”. And yes, it’s saying “cuntdown” instead. Uuuuuuuh… I guess that’s also something.